Even if you’re new to the world of firearms and the shooting sports, chances are good that you’ve had occasion to note that many of the things you’re seeing and doing don’t really track very well with what you’ve seen, read and heard from the mainstream media. But it’s a mistake to think of the “mainstream media” as a monolith; after all, it’s composed of individual journalists. This #FunFriday, we’re offering this quiz to see if you, dear reader, are qualified to be a part of that proud and honorable tradition. Let us know how you did in the comments!
1. What is this thing? a. An AK-47. It has a shoulder thing that goes up, that’s how you can tell. b. A Glock that someone is about to sneak through an airport X-ray machine, because Glocks are made of plastic. c. I don’t know, but this killing machine makes me very uneasy... d. A highly specialized air rifle designed for use in shooting competitions.
2. How about these things? a. Five AK-47s. You can tell by the pointiness. b. Extremely dangerous explosives that could go off at any time, so if we find one rolling around in the back of someone’s truck we should panic. c. I don’t know, but I'm sweating all over. d. Some .17 HMR cartridges, which are rimfire rounds suitable for small-game hunting and long-range target shooting once they have been loaded into a rifle capable of firing them.
3. What is happening in this photo? a. A child is pointing an AK-47 at me. You can tell he is a sniper by the camouflage. b. Two silly people who don’t know that meat comes from the grocery store are blasting away at endangered species. c. I don’t know, but I’ve assumed the fetal position while shivering in a mysterious puddle. Send help. d. A father is teaching his son about the value of science-based conservation, ethical hunting and safe firearms handling as they hunt turkeys together.
4. Which of these things applies to you, the American citizen? a. I didn’t know AK-47s came in text format. Huh. b. The first thing. That second thing was just a typo or something. c. I don’t care, but I’m 100% certain I need new pants! d. All of them apply to me as an individual, and I don’t see why this is so confusing to some people.
5. What does this sign mean? a. The AK-47s have been rounded up and put in a pen. b. There is no more crime and all of our problems have been solved. Kum-ba-yah! c. I finally know one—it’s a safe space! (I hope they sell pants there.) d. This is a business that doesn’t want my money.
If you got mostly A’s: Congratulations! You’re qualified to be a mainstream journalist…if you can figure out how to hide from the AK-47s, that is!
If you got mostly B’s: You’re also qualified to be a mainstream journalist…if you can find someone else to take over your YouTube commenting duties, that is!
If you got mostly C’s: You’re already a mainstream journalist. And also the reason we buy stock in companies that make laundry detergent.
If you got mostly D’s: Sorry, but you just don’t have what it takes to write about guns or gun rights for a mainstream publication. The good news is that you can still get rich (see the stock tip above)!